It’s a burden to carry around a grudge against someone
It is easier to let it go
Hanging on to it only keeps me in the past
I can move forward
I am free!

It is difficult to carry a grudge.  Really hard.  The weight of a grudge will take a physical and emotional toll on your well-being.  It is a terrible burden to think about the wrong others have done to you and not let go of a victim mentality or that of self-righteousness. 

Feel Lighter

A grudge is a bad feeling or hate you hold against another person for something bad they did, or you think they did, to you.

               Urban Dictionary

A few months ago, I was recounting the unfairness and difficulties I had experienced over my lifetime that I held as grudges.  These were rooted in self-righteousness.  This memory is so clear that I remember where I was driving.  Suddenly it stopped.  I had a realization that it is just too much work to hold onto these grudges and the accompanying sadness.  The price of thinking I was right or had been victimized was too high. 

As the ruminating stopped, I began to actually feel lighter.  The tension was gone in my throat and in my chest.  I felt free.  Yes, free.  I am not going back there.  Never.  Never.  Never.  

Grudges are Ugly

Ugly Dollarphotoclub_69784049.jpg

Holding onto a grudge is like wearing shoes that are too tight leaving you exhausted by the end of the day or like putting on an outfit that makes you look ugly and uncomfortable. They will drag you down and make you unhappy and grouchy. 

The thing is, a grudge is something you decide to pick up (or put on).  No one makes you carry that load (or wear those uncomfortable shoes).  Nancy Colier describes the power in a grudge’s identity and how they don’t heal the hurt.  Feeling that hurt and letting go of the burden will strengthen your core and allow love to flow, both to yourself and to others.


What will you need to do to be free of your grudges?  Start by asking yourself these questions.:

  • Are you carrying around a grudge or two? 

  • Are you weighed down with events from the past that still burden you? 

  • Are you pondering unfair treatment in the past that you cannot do anything about today? 

  • Is there something in you that feels like you can dictate the ‘fairness’ of each and every situation? 

Here is an article with 8 tips to stop holding a grudge and become free.  Use these tips to gain your freedom from the weight of your grudges.

It’s Your Choice

We all only have so much energy and hours each day.  Are you spending it nursing grudges?  By doing that, you use your precious time and energy on a dead end proposition.  It is an investment in something that will yield only negative returns and it is your choice of whether to hold onto it or not.

Take a moment today to look your grudge(s) straight in the eye.  Feel what was hurtful about them and then let it go.  Walk away lighter and free.  There are other things that need your strength and energy. 

It is a choice to love your-self.