It hurts to be ignored.  It happened to me recently and I spiraled into the mindset of a victim and believing I am unworthy.  For those of us prone to anxiety or depression, it’s an easy fall.  There is a solution.  It just takes a little courage.

The Spice Store

I was with some friends at a spice store.  The clerk was clearly passionate about her product and the conversation flowed easily.  I enjoy listening and the energy in the room as palatable.  When it came time to check out, the clerk helped everyone but me.  I felt left out and ignored.  She was clearly distracted by all of the questions thrown at her so I decided to do something constructive, . . . without hurt feelings.

Check Please

‘May I check out please?’  It was a simple question but one that needed to be spoken in the midst of all the chatter about spices.  The clerk responded to my request and rang me up.  It felt good to take responsibility for my emotions and take back my power.  All I had to do is ask for what I wanted.

Have You Been Ignored?

Have you found yourself left out and ignored?  It feels icky.  That’s the time to care for yourself by simply asking for what you want.  Although it’s easy to make up a story about why this is happening, that really is a selfish train.  When we focus on ourselves it's as if we’re the only one that matters.  Take a moment, breathe, and do something daring.  Just ask for what you want.


Asking for what we want can be difficult.  We can think that it’s easier to sit with those bad feelings or we may believe those feelings will just go away.  The truth is they settle into our minds and heart and root themselves into our beliefs.  That’s unhealthy and doesn’t end well.  Been there.  Lived that.

The next time you find yourself with sad or unsettling emotions, take the bold step to ask for what you want.  Do it without emotion.  The second part of the exchange will take courage too.  You’ll need to allow the other person to say yes or no to your request. 

Because . . . they get to say what they want too.